TLDR: This is the year where I focus my energy exchanges with the correct people. Must be reciprocal and include both gratifying experiences as well as uncomfortable ones. The following is a mind dump note to myself…it’s all over the place.
At Empathy Lab, I am constantly talking about Energy (I promise, this is NOT meant to be a plug). I talk about energy more often than I talk about all of the other 10 skills that are practiced in the Empathy Decathlon™ (an empathy practice for individuals and teams/communities). It is the first micro-skill of the the decathlon. Personal Energy is the foundation of personal growth and growth with others. With low Energy and high Baggage (micro-skill #2), we are physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually incapable to grow.
Without energy, it is difficult if not impossible to grow.
Without energy, I am not able to grow in the ways that I desire.
Without energy, we cannot grow together in ways that we desire.
“Feed me Seymour, feed me!” We are not unlike plants. Let me create energy, feed me energy, share energy with me, and let’s make energy together.
I want to grow.
My mom called me a “weed” as a kid. She started this in me. She grew me to be a tall and vibrant plant. Bashir is here to bring good news.
I have an innate and somewhat ravenous curiosity that transcends the time I have on this earth and the laws that other men have created to control me. This past year (2021) taught me that others do actually need me to continue growing, thus I need to better cultivate, sustain, and utilize my own energy. I feel best when I grow from the challenges that I face. This all means also that I need to better align myself and my energy with other humans that share a similar energy and growth mindset.
This is where it gets uncomfortable, it means that I must slow my energy share with those that cannot share it back with me. I love many of these individuals, but I must come to terms that the energy I want to share with them is not something they desire to share back with me at this time in life. Waiting energy is similar to chasing energy, it’s going in one direction. Knowing how I can turn down my energy tap and redirect it elsewhere is a must in order for me to fulfill my ravenous curiousity.
So my task at hand, I must examine many of the energy exchange relationships that I have and take inventory of the Energy to Baggage exchange. If I am constantly carrying other people’s Baggage, I am depleting my own energy faster than I can cultivate it. If I am constantly chasing their energy, I am depleting my energy without exchange. If I am constantly waiting for their energy, I am depleting my energy without renewal. I desire healthy flow of energy that is both gratifying and uncomfortable. It’s this uncomfortable side that I’ve been avoiding, because I also fear that if I leave a misaligned energy exchange, I will never find that type of energy again. The the majority of my energy exchanges must be reciprocal in nature, not contractural or a waiting/chase game.
Time to be present with myself AND those that want to share energy with me.
It’s time to grow with others that want to grow.