A stagnant life that is full of false comforts, performative people, authoritarian-like control, and flat emotions won’t kill me immediately, but will certainly render me frantic and hopeless. To transition from a place of beautifully stagnant comfort into a place of more possibilities and more hurdles tests ones motives and goals. How can we leave behind the stunning catalogue picture we cut out and taped on the wall of our hearts and minds for a new place, new space, new people, and new commuties? New is scary, right? Old is comfortable, like my ancient Empathy Lab shirts that I have refused to throw away that are so thin that they’re almost see through and quick to stink up. What’s the fear of new and novel, a lack of control? People are going to look at us funny. We won’t know anyone. I’ll be the newbie in the group. It feels like we are abandoning our successes and opting to start over.
Transitions are good, because they allow me to shed old t-shirts, enjoy old memories, find new experiences, and adjust who I am as I continue to grow. Pack up the belonging that are cornerstones to my being, bring people that want to continue the adventure. Leave behind that which doesn’t serve you and people that only burden you.
While a move, literally, from a beautiful home in rural Georgia up to the city isn’t much, it allows me and us to assess what the fuck we are doing. What do we want, desire, not want, want to avoid, etc. It is part of continuous growth that I need, to love where Ive been and love where I am going.
The transitions in play:
- We moved from Serenbe to Decatur, Georgia
- We are renting a two bedroom apartment for the 4 of us (feels like a downgrade and ego deflater…and we love it)
- Kids are in new schools, middle and high
- L and I are in a new office
- I’m studying to expand my career opportunities in mediation (not meditation) and somatic therapy (opposite of talk therapy, not a traditional masseuse)
- Purging all of our old technology
- Back in regular therapy to keep investing in myself, growing and expanding my being
- Actively looking for fun communities of people to adventure with in the area and around the world
- Planning adventures for myself (most important), with L, with the family, with my brother
- Reinvesting in my partnership and marriage to L
- Releasing shame, fear, and incessantly over waiting for others and things and finally…
- Reinvesting in my partnership and lifelong companionship with myself (sorry Shai, I’ve neglected you, you are totally rad, dude!)
Hello, I am Shelton. 